you were right, no one’s running this whole thing

i love you new york

why do you have to be so damn cold 

there aren’t enough hours in the day to live the lives we want.  a routine consumes and encroaches to destroy your dreams. slowly but surely this will not be true. we are scheduling to open early next year (yp) and this summer (the effort). big things, life changing things.

for a long time i have been a closed book, sitting and pulling apart every sentence to find something negative giving me grounds to walk away. this is the first time in what seems like a year and some change, i am actually attempting. and it seems to keep me smitten. i’m excited. i really am. 

the last few days have been extremely awesome.. we recorded until 7am on sunday, got up at 1pm and did the city thing and came back.

thursday i had a second date with this amazing female who goes by the name of melissa.

friday my friends at work had my new boss who fired me buy pizza and we all stuffed our faces in an empty vp’s office. tomorrow i am working as a temp in the same office, same floor. it will be different, but i’m not really worried about it.

monday and today, i cleaned and ran errands…. which i am still doing. sorta…this weekend i will be having my wisdom teeth extracted. friday morning. and all weekend i am sure i will

be completely out of it.

“you can dream a little dream or you can live a little dream, i’d rather live it- b/c dreamers always chase but never get it” aesop rock 

i took this yesterday while flirting with a red head.

so, i am about to be without a job. this sucks. it would be awesome to have something lined up and to have more than 100$ to my name. i think i am going to try to go back to school. i owe around 120,000 i wanna see how fast it would take to make that 300,000. i am sort seeing this certain someone who i am taking to her first sushi experience this evening. she is amazing.

if you like soft(hard)core anal rape see descent. if not please don’t. i think i’m going to throw up.

you could give me all the gore in the world and i wouldn’t feel as naucious as i do when it comes to rape. i remember almost crying in derailed w/ clive owen and jenn anniston. descent made me curl up in a ball and the ending made me want to projectile vomit- all 29 minutes or so of it. jesus fucking christ.

i love you. be good to your mothers.

a

oh also. when your roommate doesn’t want to leave the bar with you to go home at 3am on a tuesday- wait on him. i mean the other option is to leave without him, fall asleep on an L train and wake up at broadway junction on the opposite track heading back to manhattan- meaning you went all the way to the canarsie projects (returning unscathed hopefully) and still not making it home before him. so just wait for him to get that last drink- drink some water or something, go to a deli and get a candy bar or a sandwich… it be better than waking up disoriented in queens.

ps. if you go to seattle go the the honey hole… and get one of these- it called the guapo and its better than anything ever created using bread and veggies. and no, i didn’t eat the wrapper- it tore, although if i had that wrapper right now i’d eat it. mmmm so good.

today my heart is in seattle, washington, my body is in new york city, new york and my mind is stuck on a certain red-headed someone.  i am so tired. 3hrs difference can really beat the shit out of you. i want to crawl up and die. 

on other terms- i might be using “by the careful hands of surgeons” as a name for my music- man alive is taken- i think its some euro grunge band or something. idk.

i don’t know what to do with myself, i have until the end of the week as an employed person. friday is the day, not only do i embark on unemployed-ism, but sole and the skyrider band play at knitting. i wanna go. whos coming with me?